I had a moment when I rode by bike to work this morning: I suddenly felt a little Vancouverish feeling inside. Now it could have been that the leaves were scurrying across the street (although that happens in Illinois-where I grew up). It could have been that I’m on the west coast+the first seemingly fall day (even though I’m in Northern California). Or it could have been that “school excitement” feeling since it’s the beginning of cooler weather, the feeling of starting over, while embracing something real…and lastly, it quite possibly could have been that I wanted to be cozy in a Lululemon jacket that snuggles with my neck and thumbs like I was in Van (and I remembered there was a shop a couple of blocks down on University Ave). …Could it be “E – All of the above?”
This time that I am in…seems to be bringing some type of newness. I am excited to let fresh air blow through my heart and mind. For time to grow what is real and for time to let things pass that aren’t. Today coming home, I lit a few candles, played Rosie Thomas’ Only With Laughter and When We Were Small and phoned a dear friend I hadn’t talked to in ages. One of those friends you talk with once or twice a year, wishing it was more, but somehow, even though that doesn’t happen, you’re both able to mysteriously jump back into things immediately. It was wonderful to hear that extra bounce in her voice from a newfound love, and also other updates, i.e. finishing up her grad program after quite a few years off. Probably most of all, I loved some of her wittiness that filled out her comments. After sharing how sometimes I need to shut my brain off from processing, she assured me that it was a woman’s right to do that in a lovely tone that was like a flamenco dancer twirling around and ending with a quick whip of her dress. Fair enough.
I shared with her about my garden. About the joy it had brought me. While I talked briefly about it, I appreciated that she got it, i.e. why it was dear to me. Or selfishly, I was thankful that she shared my perspective of the land – of using our hands to bring about scripture in an incarnate way. The dirt in the land having something to offer, something to give to others and something deserving to be cared for because it exists and because man does have a relationship with the terra in a biological and even meta-physical type of way. I expressed how I was excited to use this space and time for prayer in a deeply quiet sort of way. “My soul feels like it’s almost being pulled out of me. Like God is beckoning me to spend time with him…just being…in my garden.”
By the time we got off the phone about an hour and a half passed, laughter had infused the air like a beautiful bouquet of flowers while deeper thoughts added dimension, color, clarity, and quality to our lengthy conversation. …Breathing deeply, I inhaled the refreshing nutrients a dear friend can give.
Talking to her was a perfect way to round out that Vancouverish feeling inside me as she, ironically, currently resides in Vancouver. I’m looking forward to riding to work tomorrow morning, hearing the dry and crispy leaves blow across the road, feeling the wind tumble over my nose, cheeks and eyes, and inhaling it into my lungs…all while wearing a Lululemon jacket I splurged on after work.
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